I had some friends over at my home for a group study that didn't end up being a group study but turned out to be a barkada night instead. We watched a movie and talked nonstop about our experiences and about people we love to hate. Of course, we talked about who back bites who. We were talking about other people but something was clear, a lot of people hated me. I didn't bother to ask why because it'd end up like an open forum and I didn't want to cry. LOL.
The next day at school, I was hanging out with my friend and asked him what people say about me. I wasn't really surprised but I was still hurt about people being so two faced! They pretend to be my friends, joke around, share stories and a lot of things that friends usually do but then, behind my back, they say awful things and I become the center of every joke. Which, for the record, I know I already am, thank you very much! They listen to me and wait for things that I say and then when I'm gone, they'll use it against me as a laughing matter. They do that, I don't know, because they hate me? To make them feel better about theirselves? Or are they just too intrested in taking me down, making me look like a fool to everyone else than getting to know me better? Probably.
Then there's this gay guy who keeps asking me about my sexuality and making comments about me for everything! I'm dull for having F on Bio Lab, how my shoulders are not proportional, etc. What the fuck is his problem? I mean, I totally know why he's doing this, he hates me for looking at him so lowly. Or whatever! The thing is, everyone is on my side anyway so it doesn't matter.
It's kind of stressful and scary to socialize when you're afraid after that you do, they make you a piece of laughing stock. I just hope that those people get theirs.
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