Highschool Ends, Eventually

Listening to Say You'll Never Go by Erik Santos would be deemed corny, cheap and very jologs but I remembered that song and suddenly had the urge to listen to it and I did. While the song was playing I was looking at old pictures from my Friendster account and felt very sad. I don't know if it was the song or the pictures or maybe both but it made me smile in a hurt kind of way. I really hate memories, no matter how happy they are, because it always makes me sad but the good side there is it makes me realize about important things like friendships.

Right now, as I write this, it's as if the memories are flashing in my head. I want them to stop because I can't feel depressed right now. I really miss everything! My friends, my old schools, the places I hung out, etc. They were memories. Even though I really hate that word, memories, I have to use it.

I know that I've made mistakes with my friends and that I'm not the most well liked person on Earth but the thing is, I miss them! Badly! I can't say sorry enough for 'you' to forgive me but I really am remoseful for everything that I did. If I could just turn back time then I would and make things right I would.

For the sake of looking at old pictures, I looked at the new ones and I felt something. I really hated the feeling but when I was looking at new pictures taken since June up to now, I felt that pang of pain in my heart because they already felt like a memory. Time really passes by doesn't it?

Some people in the pictures were people I don't really care about or bother greeting even though I see them in a daily basis but that made me realize that I should cherish them even if we're not close or anything because those people are part of my past, present and future.

Its sad isn't it? How people come in your life then just go away. We miss them of course, but sometimes you just have to give them up. You were happy but it had to end.

I am currently listening to Prom Theme by Fountains of Wayne and the song is a killing bitch! I suggest you to listen to this song (or Erik Santos') while reading this post or looking at pictures and you will definitely hit that emo button.

We'll see each other again. I know it. And maybe next time every hurt in the past would just go away and we'll remember the happy ones.

Academically Downhill

I won't deny that I'm an irresponsible student because not only that I am, I think I would actually get an A+ for it. The truth is, I'm not really good at this whole education system! I hate studying and listening to boring topics especially those where I have no idea what the relevance is to my course! Yes, Biology and Chemistry! I'm talking about you!

F! F! F! Those were my grades this Midterm. I know, it's like, uhmm... I don't know really know how to explain myself and I won't go there! Or not! Like I said, I hate studying and listening! But that expected F was actually embarassing and degrading! I didn't know that I would feel sad, defeated, belittled by that F mark! Gosh! What the F!

It was true, what they said about college. It's not the same as highschool. Eventually we all have to grow up and take responsibility for our future. The thing is, its not just your future you're ruining but everybody elses. Like your parents' money, they didn't pick them from trees or the streets but worked their asses off for it.

I calculated how many years I would be in college and I decided with 10 years minimum as I would proceed to Law after Developmental Communication. That's 10 years! I have these dreams that I pretty much want to come true and I have to do those before or after 30 at least!

So what am I still doing writing this blog? There's no class tommorow! Study I will, tommorow!

P.S. Do nuts really help?

Bits and Bytes

It has been awhile since I posted something and to tell you the truth, the stories that I'm going to share need some hard recalling. Well, you know me, I often lose friendships and gain new ones and sometimes, take back those lost friendships.

My JANBRCL group and I are at peace already and I couldn't feel more relieved. They invited me to Loreto's twice but I refused because I had other plans. Gosh! They were my friends since highschool and I really miss them! A lot! I'm sure you know what I mean when you miss people you've never seen for a long time because you've had differences and (not necessarily) hate each other. And now, everything's okay! I really hope that this time, it would work out because I really do cherish them.

My batchmates from MaryMount Academy are such pranksters and you would just enjoy their company. I love those guys!

Of course, being me, things are uncertain in my friendships. There is this one friend of mine whom I don't hang out that much anymore when we were supposed to be close. Maybe he was just fed up with me because sometimes I can be bossy or whatever! But the thing is, he can't just blow me off! We're hanging out then suddenly we don't! My other friend who was always part of the group and I nkow has my back is still there! She has been the sweetest person as of late and I really appreciate her.

Anyway, it comes as no surprise that I failed every subject I'm taking. Like literally. Well, this is definitely a wake up call! I really have to study and be serious and not slack off and be lazy! I mean, this is my future we're talking about here! Sorry, I got carried away a little bit.

Did you also know that I'm completely broke? How am I gonna survive with 200 pesos 'till Tuesday? Damn!

I promise you one thing dear readers, I'm gonna blog weekly! Yay! No one wants to visit an outdated blog right?

Lack of Imagination

If you think I posted this pic because I like myself in it, think again! Ugh!

I hate my face! Sometimes.

I'm A Self Confessed Geek Who's A Nerd-A-Holic

I'm literally obsessed with this candy! I have been(obsessed) years ago when I accidentally saw them at Cham's counter and haven't stopped hurting my pocket ever since! Damn you Wonka!

Immaturity of the Red Nosed Reindeer

Crazy things happen to me! I'm just destined to have a crazy uncontrollable life!

Last Wednesday while logging on to Facebook, I decided to finall try buying some of my friends through the application Friends For Sale or FFS. I bought a lot of inexpensive people because I couldn't really afford some of my friends as they've been playing FFS for quite sometime now and their prices went up.

I chanced on buying an old friend who is a girl because she was very, uhmm... cheap! Both literal and figurative! I'm sorry! After buying her, she was stolen from an old schoolmate of mine whom I didn't know at that time was dating my girl friend(thats two words!). So I bought her back and he bought her back again until we were competing! He kept saying bad comments about me but I thought they were like jokes so I didn't mind them. I thought we were having fun! I logged out of Facebook and when I logged back in this afternoon I was surprised to recieve a message from the girl.

She kept thanking me and saying how much she appreciated that I bought her and then told me to stay out of sight of the guy because he was gonna kill me if he sees me. She even told me not to reply and delete the message immedeately! Crazeballs!

I replied of course but deleted the message! What was the big deal? The guy is a joke! Who takes FFS seriously? C'mon! Answer me! Who does? You've gotta be kidding me! The guy even posted on my wall a very harsh message! He didn't really say who it was but it was obvious he was talking about me! He posted it last night which means he didn't get over on how mad he was at me last Wednesday! So that means this guy really takes his investments in FFS seriously! It doesn't matter if you're in a relationship or not! You should go to a dating site instead! How immature!

Truth be told, I'm a little scared when I meet him! It's not really about getting another black eye but of the embarassment! What if people see us? Damn! The worst thing of all is that I see him everyday! If he punches me then I'll punch him back! Isn't that the rule? But if he threatens him then I'll just leave him alone! I'm not asking for a fight or a boxing match because I don't have the strength to punch someone! I have a very bony fist and that means it's soft! God help me! I was really panicking about the message from the girl asking me to lay low and stuff! The guy is pretty mamirahay type of guy.

To the guy: Grow up! I know why you didn't include your last name at Facebook because its pretty funny and I know what it is!

To the girl: Hello? You can't even defend me? You bitch! You should thank me for not erasing you in my account! Thank God you were the one who invited me!

P.S. You know the christmas song? That's his name! Red Nosed Reindeer! Go figure!

The Funeral

Ate Karen crying while giving a heartfelt speech.

The whole family. A picture of moving on.

Burying the coffin.

Does Free Will Exist?

Are our lives decided by God or do we live it OUR way?

My RS-15 class discussed this very interesting topic because of a report that led to this. Don't make me write it here 'coz I don't remember but it was really a classmate of mine who shared to the class his thoughts that our lives are decided by God since we were born and that we only have 20% free will.

I thought it was preposterous! Unacceptable! I mean, no offense to God but even if he gave us our lives I still think that we should live it the way we want to and that thing called destiny is a myth! Romantic movies are so misleading! There's no such thing as the person for me or the one. Wake up people! Especially to the ladies! How many marriages actually end up in divorce? It's not about finding your soulmate but working on a relationship! I haven't been on one but from what I've heard you really work hard for it.

I can already hear the rants of people who believe in destiny!

Okay, you're going to say that most Filipino marriages don't end up in annulment but do the wives smell the whore? The husbands are reeking of it! Most of my friends' fathers have a mistress and some have couple trouble. As I always say, the whole cheating thing is so uso it's next to teenage pregnancy andunwanted pregnancy.

Back to the point. My classmate said that he was destined to be in Xavier University because God had planned it for him and that if a person dies at, lest's say 21 years old, it's his destiny. I asked my teacher what if I commited suicide at the age of 21, did God plan for me to do that? This matter really causes debate so I'm gonna stop as I've shared my opinions already. How about you? What do you think?

Flowers for the Sartorialist

My Familys Condolences to my Uncle

The Last Thread of the Sartorialist

The day that everyone knew was coming and prepared for, my uncle passing away.


And he did, finally.

I was watching DVD's when my sister texted me that my Uncle passed away just minutes before she sent me the message. I wasn't shocked and sad. Everyone had expected it and wanted him to rest already, really, we didn't want him to suffer the disease any longer.


I ate dinner then got dressed and rushed to the hospital. Though I was expecting people breaking down on the floor and all that teleserye exaggerations, I was greeted with "moved on" faces. Though I suspect there's going to be a lot of crying during the burial.


I saw him on his deathbed and it felt a little weird being so close to a dead person as I haven't been before, but it was my uncle so it didn't really horrify me that much. He was then transferred to Greenhills memorial park and then it felt official, he was gone.


Seeing him in the coffin gave me jitters but it was saddening, especially for his wife, my aunt, who is now a widow and will forever miss her husband. Its painful, the death of a loved one, but people come and go and then we move on. Not from the pain and memories but moving on through a challenge in life, the dark side of it.


Uncle Undoy, you have always been so good to me and my siblings and of course to your sister, my mother, and to her husband, my father, you will be missed. Badly. Thank you for your humor and hospitality and I'm sure everyone is gonna say great things about you not just because your gone but you really were when you were still with us and we're sorry if in any way we ever hurt you.


Goodbye.


P.S. Say Hi to God for me, please?

Fatty

I love photo blogging! The pictures just say it all! But you're probably gonna be sick of a blog full of pictures (or not) so I'm still going to 'put into words' when I'm posting.

By the way, I just thought about posting this picture of my favorite lunch at school. It's fried pork chop with gravy and rice. I love it!

Happiness on a cup

How do you like your ice cream? Me? Soft and sprinkled with candies!

Unfortunately when I was throwing it there were little melted amounts of ice cream left and it spilled on my pants and shoes! Argh!

It was a very stressful but fun Saturday.

It never stops, does it?

I don't want to be specific because I haven't even shared it with my friends but typical me, here I go again.

This afternoon I was hurt, really hurt. It's hard to explain how and why but if you've read my blog (like every post) you'll have an idea what it is.

P.S. The reason I never told anyone is because they're sick of my problems and I'm not waiting for them to get sick of me.

I love me some "education"

My sister told me that some EDA students read my blog and I really feel surprised because I thought only my friends read it.

Welcome to my world new friends.

Thank you!

The Wost Week Ever

Recently, it's all've been about tragedies, misfortunes and deaths. My week was a never ending embarassment and I'm afraid its still coming. As you all know last Monday (July 27) was my birthday and nothing really happened that much which counts as a bad day in this very, very bad week.

Now that I'm blogging about it, it's a relief (sort of) that I can't remember some of the worse things that happened to me these past seven days. But let me think... aha! Got it!

Bad thing that happened contestant number 1:

July 27- my birthday and I didn't really do anything except complain how my day was and feeling shitty about it. I expected an adventure and what did I get? Read the post before this.

Bad thing that happened contestant number 2:

July 28- I woke up early around 6am for a 9:40am P.E. class. I took my time because I love listening to music and I wanted to dance. I did my usual routine before leaving the house, got on a jeepney and patiently waited to get to school, WHEN(!!!!), I was reaching for my fare when I realized that I was reaching for nothing because I forgot to bring my wallet! I haven't got a single cent in me and I was panicking inside my head. Trembling, body hairs raising up, goosebumps, stomach churning, everything! I felt it all!

I tried to recall everything I did before leaving the house to really make sure if I brought money or not when I officially had to land on a confirmation: Joulo, buanga ka! Wala ka nagdala ug kwarta dong! Hala ka sige! Unsaon na nimo run!

I was searching for familiar faces in the jeepney and found a neighbour! Thank God! But the problem was that I didn't really know my neighbour and we don't speak. We don't even look at each other! But I had to go talk (beg) to her before the conductor beats my ass off.

I approached her at the opposite seat leaving my pride and dignity on my former seat and told her, "Hi te. Kuan man gud, uhmm, nbilin nako akong kwarta! Wala jud ko nakadala bisag piso! Pwede pautang ug seven Pesos? Wala jud te! As in!". Smell the desperation yet? Well, let's just say she was a saint and paid my fare for me. I kept on thanking her and hoped she wasn't annoyed or anything.

The thing is, I know her kids and she might tell them! And then her kids will tell other neighbours so you might as well chop me and serve me for dinner now! And I mean now!

As if that wasn't enough yet, I managed to still have a face for my P.E. class when I discovered that my P.E. shirt had this mold stain in it and will never go away because, I don't really know exactly, it's because I do my own laundry and I'm not really good at it. Cheers!

Don't laugh just yet! While performing the intended procedure, the sole of my shoe fell off! You missed that? IT FUCKIN' FELL OFF YOU MOTHERF-----!!!!!

On an even worser note, everyone in school saw me and some were laughing, naturally! Why was this happening to me? Why God, why? Sorry God. But dear readers! Why?

Bad thing that happened contestant number 3:

July 30- Probably the worst thing that happened (you be the judge!). It was a rainy day, my classmates and I were waiting outside our classroom when I saw my lab partner in Chemistry and told him that we should finish our report. I was a little cheery(being myself) so I was running a li'l bit when BAM! I don't even know if BAM is the proper sound of it but I slid through the slippery floor and hit it! The impact was so hard and loud that the teacher in the other room where the doors were closed went out to check on me.

I was embarassed 'coz there were people so I got up and joked a little bit about sliding. People I couldn't recall helped me stand up when I realized that my head was throbbing like a bitch! It was really painful that I couldn't really focus. I just stood with my hands on my knees for support and stared at the floor. People were talking but I couldn't hear them. Everyone was panicking and I stareted too when I heard that I was bleeding.

It wasn't really a big deal for me that I was bleeding but everyone was shoving tissue into my forehead and the teacher insisted that I go to the clinic immedeately. I told the teacher there was no need to but everyone insisted. I even joke a lot because of that humiliating slide.

I was walking on campus and everyone kept looking. When we got to the clinic they had this face like I was hit by a bus or something. I understood those reactions when they said that I needed to be stitched. I echoed their faces. A stitch? NO! I'm deathly afraid of needles!

I kept begging them not to stitch me but they said that it can't happen or I will lose lots of blood and some other illnesses. I texted my sister to come immedeately because she was the only family I had and I needed her.

Kudos to my friend KC for being with me all the way! Thank you!

It's kind of a very long story. I was crying my ass off because I really didn't like pain and needles. I was stiched in the forehead five times and got a bandage (of course, duh?). Everyone was looking, everyone was asking, I wrote about it on Facebook, my family was worried, typical reactions. It was PAINFUL, the slide.

Bad thing that happened contestant number 4:

August 1:

I was absent for the second time in my CWTS class and wouldn't be allowed to absent anymore. I woke up late surfing the internet. My fault!


So? What story do you think wins?

Cheers! To the worst week ever!